The Six Months of Christmas

One enjoyable thing about having friends and family scattered across the country is that come Christmas-time, presents start appearing on our doorstep at random intervals, some without previous notice. It has seemed more like Hannukah at our apartment, with many days of presents instead of one day-to-end-all-days of gift-giving. And we have thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated each and every special arrival.

One of the more exciting presents to show up on our doorstep, especially when it comes to this blog, was a Styrofoam encased pair of champagnes, courtesy of the future hubby’s parents. They actually purchased a “champagne of the month” type deal for us, wherein we will receive not one but two champagnes each month via airmail for the next six months. A Christmas present that lasts until June! We couldn’t be happier.

While we wanted to wait until Christmas to try our enticing new bubblies, we quickly realized we did not possess that kind of restraint. You should see what happens to freshly baked cookies. We consumed both bottles in the span of one weekend, but were sure to savor every duty-free drop. And while we enjoyed both bottles because we didn’t have to bemoan the possibility of paying too much for them, we were sure to remain as objective as possible while writing reviews, in case some of you out there are not lucky enough to receive some fizzy libations as gifts this season.

The first of our December pair that we tasted was the Pol Clément Rosé Sec ($13). This blushingly pink wine was extremely fizzy out of the bottle, just bursting to fill our glasses and tickle our noses. As per its name, it has a lovely pinkish-amber hue that made it hard to drink; we didn’t want to tear our eyes away. It had a very full flavor that was not as sweet as expected, but certainly not dry. The top notes were light and flowery, with a verdant aftertaste that blended with a nectary finish. While the harmony of the flavors wasn’t quite perfect, this wine didn’t offend. And it was just playful enough to disappear before we knew it.

And before we forget, Merry Christmas! Break out the bubbly, spread the joy!

Score: This was a three all around, with some slight reservations.

Recommended: Considering the price, you could certainly do worse.

Welcome to the Big Time

(Full disclosure: this actually happened back in September. Since I'm writing the review, it's not getting posted until now. Yes, I know.)

Special occasions call for special champagne. It's as simple as that. And when the special occasion happens to be a 1-year anniversary....well, that needs a really special champagne. I mean really special.

Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present Veuve Clicquot Ponsardin La Grande Dame Brut 1998 ($180). Yes, a champagne that was born back when I was still in high school. I mean, think about it for a second: this champagne waited 12 years for us. Think of how far this bottle of champagne has travelled in those 12 years! And after all that, after everything this bottle of fizzy grape juice has gone through....it ends up with us on our 1-year anniversary. Isn't that amazing? What are the chances?

Before the actual review, I have to mention the dinner that accompanied our special champagne. The missus made Fettucine Alfredo - with homemade sauce. Watching all the butter, cream, and cheese going into this stuff actually made me feel a little bad about eating it. I mean, geez....it's basically liquid fat. But OH MY GOD IT IS SO GOOD. I can't even describe it. Easily the best pasta dish I've ever had. No exaggeration - it was really that good. And yes....I totally ate more than I should have.

But now on to the star of the show.

I think we mentioned on here before that when a champagne is really good, there's not much you can actually say about it. Well, we pushed ourselves! Trust me, it wasn't easy....because this champagne isn't just good, it's amazing.

The smell is wonderful - delicate, slightly sweet, very clean. It smells meek, light. Then you drink it, and realize it's the exact opposite! Big flavors. Gigantic, bold flavors. It's so rich, you almost start to feel like it's thicker than regular champagne. It coats your mouth. It's like caramel, fruity with a dark sweetness. It kind of has a musk about it, but in a really good way. Not like a musk ox. Then you swallow - which is actually a little difficult. I'm serious, the longer you keep in in your mouth, the better it gets! But once you finally get around to swallowing, you realize it has that perfect "dry but not too dry" finish. Know what I mean? It's just right. And the flavors linger long afterwards....it's amazing. It sounds overly dramatic, but drinking this champagne is really an experience.

Score: a unanimous 5. There's no question about it. When you drink this, you're drinking champagne for real.

Recommended? Without a doubt. Yes, it's expensive - but it's worth every single cent. I can't stress that enough. If you've got a special occasion coming up, seek out a bottle of this stuff. It's like liquid heaven.

Hunting the Albino Alligator

One nice thing living in the Washington, D.C. area did provide was a broad range of museums within which to totally nerd-out for free. The Smithsonians are owned by the American people, and we are indeed members of the American people, so our tickets were already paid for (through taxes, which might mean technically we paid the entrance fee far, far in advance, but let’s not get technical). Moving out to San Francisco, we were suddenly faced with the decision to either pay $30 to get our nerd fix, or save that money for true necessities, like champagne.

But every once in a while, the museums of San Francisco take pity on the middle class geeks of this fair city and offer something for free. A short time ago, we took advantage of just such an offer, and were able to spend our entire afternoon joyously giving our natural history muscles a workout at the California Academy of Sciences, for free! While we loved numerous exhibits throughout the museum, like the mammoth catfish that could easily swallow a five-year-old child, or the adorable poison dart frogs who look just like candy (tricky little devils), our favorite part of the visit this time around was Claude, the albino alligator. The mystery, the majesty, the creepy way he never moved while we were looking at him and yet was always in a different position when we stopped by ten minutes later. We are already planning new ways to sneak up on him in action when the next free weekend comes around six months from now. It may involve ski masks.

And since this weekend outing was free, we had money in our pockets for the essentials, like another bottle of sparkling wine, ripe for a review. This time we chose the j Cuvée 20 ($27). We already spoke favorably of the j Rosé, and were hopeful that the rest of the varieties would not disappoint. This wine certainly did not. It was very crisp, bubbly, and bright. It had a clean, light, almost peachy aroma. With delicate undertones to every sip, it was fun to drink and had a very light bitterness that actually balanced the complex flavors of the wine. It was impressively balanced and nuanced for a California wine. But we must admit, it was no albino alligator.

Score: A unanimous 4.

Recommended: Yep, it’s a little pleasure in a bottle.

Just Get Me Through to Morning

It might be a little too early to celebrate anything right now on this election evening. Ballots are still being counted, bruises are still bursting their way to the surface of many a battered soul (politics makes us alliterative). There have been a few turn of events that have actually made us smile, a lot that made us queasy, and a few that just made us scratch our heads – like that witch-lady, did she really think she was going to win? If you have to run an ad on television declaring you’re not a witch, we’re pretty sure you’re really a witch.

But no matter who wins or loses, or what ridiculous propositions pass that will give more money to the bajillionaires down in their beach homes in Malibu, there are still a few things to tip a glass to tonight. First, we will no longer have to see Meg Whitman’s smug little face talking about how she’s all about the California dream. If she was auctioning her “truthiness” (thank you, G.W.) she’d get negative bids. But most importantly, no more political ads! We can finally turn on the television for a lively game of Jeopardy without being inundated with bad lighting, annoying voice-overs, and things we “can’t afford.” Geez, it’s a recession, you don’t have to tell us what we can’t afford.

Although, that Yes on 21 ad didn’t bother us too much, what with those cute little foxes and all.

So if you’re ready to sip some bubbly in celebration of commercial breaks returning to little geckos and pizza salesman, try a bottle of Drusian Valdobbiadene Prosecco Superiore ($15). A wine from Italy? Yes! Because who isn’t tired of America right now? And prosecco is easier on the wallet then French champagnes, so you can save your money for all the whiskey you’ll need once you realize the state the country is in after the elections. But back to the prosecco. This one smelled strongly floral and fruity right out of the bottle, with a refreshing amount of carbonation to give it just the right amount of kick. It had a sweetness that fills your entire mouth and lasts long after you’ve drunk it down. It did retain some mildly bitter apple undertones with a light dryness, but these didn’t detract from its easy drinkability. It mostly made us think of this past summer, a time when anything was still possible and hope was still alive. Eh, maybe we’ll just move to Italy they don’t have any crazy politics, right?

Score: It was a unanimous 3, but in a good way.

Recommended: Yes, this is a solid prosecco that is sure to keep its promises.

Gray Mediocrity

It’s been a rainy past few days, and it looks like the rain will last through the weekend. Expected for late October around here, but still a drag. Our late summer is officially over.

And while we morn the loss of the sun and the oncoming drab days, why not review a wine that makes us feel just as blasé?

We’ve seen this sparkling wine everywhere, from small neighborhood grocery stores to the cavernous Costco, but we had never been inclined to give it a try. Something just said “this is a wine that wishes it was something a little more French.” While this feeling still nagged us, we finally gave in and tried the Roederer Estate Anderson Valley Brut ($25). All we could say upon first sip was “grapey,” like that annoying little Welch’s girl. It didn’t provide any redeeming qualities after the first taste, with its tart, puckering finish. Although it was a very light wine, with undertones of crackers (the bastard child of actual baked bread), it left the mouth drier than we would have expected. Overall, it was fairly easy drinking, but totally unremarkable. And once we finished, we noticed our glasses smelled like feet. Eww.

Score: She gives it a 2, he has some pity and gives it a 2.5

Recommended: Pass this one, it’s a big green bottle full of tangy juice.

Even Trader Joe’s Can Let You Down

Life is full of disappointments. Like when you’ve been playing Viva Piñata for two hours and you’re still no closer to getting that damn S’morepion because the store refuses to sell venus flytrap seeds. And it’s all you’ve been waiting for! Or that feeling you get when you realize there are people out there willing to vote for Meg Whitman for governor. Those sorts of things.

Typically, the only thing about Trader Joe’s that was ever disappointing was the fact that certain beloved items could disappear from the shelves without notice (you can conjure up the image of your own particular beloved item here). Blame the fickle warehouse gods. But we recently discovered that even Trader Joe’s can advertise items as a tasty bargain when really, they’re just mediocre products masquerading as something fancy to steal your money (Meg, have you expanded into the champagne business by any chance?)

Feeling adventurous while buying our usual bucket of hummus and flax seed chips, we decided to try a French champagne we’d never heard of but which Trader Joe’s touted as a classic, the Charles D’Embrun Brut ($25). We should have sensed trouble from the beginning – the bottle was so carbonated, the cork flew out of the top without being touched, rocketing through the air and almost taking out an eye in the process. We shook off this initial assault, and plunged forward as a tart, fruity smell emanated from the bottle. But, while this wine was made in France and claimed to use traditional champagne techniques, we could taste none of the classic, yeasty overtones or complex flavors of other French champagnes. It’s possible there was a slight bread-like nuance in the aftertaste, but it was hidden by the extremely tart, unpleasantly dry finish that made us pucker all over. And the longer the wine sat in the glass, the more it smelled like wet dog.

Like never winning TJ’s raffle for bringing in our own bags (is this raffle even legit? has anyone ever won?), this champagne was a sour downer.

Score: Still not the worst we’ve had, we gave it a unanimous 2.5

Recommended: No and no, really not what we expected from a French champagne.

A Little Like Alex Trebek at a Wu-Tang Concert

Some things should probably not mix. You know, like MC Hammer and a children’s bluegrass show. Seriously. The Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival does indicate through its name that strict adherence to the term “bluegrass” is not a requirement for festival participation. But the man who brought us Hammer Pants? Even being inclusive San Franciscans, we found that to be stretching it. Although Mr. Hammer could have a down home country past of which we’re not aware. Maybe the MC stands for Mack Chevy.

We missed Hammer Time this year, but we did manage to catch Fountains of Wayne (bluegrass, no, but man did that bring us back) and Conor Oberst. Oh Conor, he can bring even a rockin country festival to a screeching, heart-breaking halt. But he’s so sincere about it. And yes, we had an unconfirmed Steve Wozniak on a segway sighting during the FoW show. Did he know he had stumbled upon a bluegrass festival? Perhaps his segway was stuck on auto-pilot, pulling his rotund personage through the streets of San Francisco willy-nilly.

And one of us (we won’t name names) downed three hot dogs in twenty minutes, experiencing both great gustatory pleasure and the crippling pain of digesting that much gut-busting minced meat.

The festival was still great, eclectic fun. Maybe the seeming senselessness of it all added to that. We’re certainly not going to complain. We have our own odd pairings from time to time. Like our combination of Gosset Excellence Brut* ($42) with homemade pad thai for dinner. Gosset claims to be the oldest running champagne house in France, and we’re not historians so we’ll take their word for it. Pad thai is not French (unless you add snails), and can be found in any American asian fusion hole-in-the-wall restaurant. And yet, we love them both, together. The Gosset had a lovely light bready smell, perfect for a champagne, with a very classic brut taste. It was fruitier than most of the bruts we’ve had, but toed the line nicely between charmingly sweet and grape juice. It was light, not too dry, and easy to drink, with minimal carbonation. It maintained its breadiness in the aftertaste, and became drier the more we drank.

The pad thai was amazing. We recommend extra peanuts.

*Warning: Do not operate a segway after drinking.

Score: She gives it a 4, he gives it a 3.

Recommended: This one certainly had prestige, but it was a little pricey. If you can find it on sale, go for it.